Far and Beyond

Ever had a dream that seemed dead? You go around circles trying to figure out how to bring it back to life only to find out that it is beyond repair. You wish it was just a nightmare and that you will wake up in a better reality but the next morning is a reminder that you are living the bad dream. Never in your entire life have you thought of being in this kind of torment. You had better plans and dreams for your dear life for goodness sake. And just when you thought life is about to be good, it hits you hard with a humongous solid rock. Face down.

You start to ask questions like is He really good because what is happening contradicts to who He says He is. You navigate through life searching for a sound reason why of all people, you were chosen to go through this valley. A lot doesn't make sense and here you are, being tossed by the waves back and forth, still with no good reason to give clarity for everything. Were you badder than them? Did you pick poor choices? Or was life a spinning roulette and the misery ball fell at your name unfortunately?

Heaven knows how much tears have kept you awake at night and the numbers of 'what ifs' you have whispered to the air. Still, no answers to your questions. Deep down inside of you is a voice that tells you to let go of all your questions because if you don't, you will miss the point of having to go through it all. You want to believe in that voice so you start to show up everyday, tell people you're okay, hoping they don't notice your swollen eyes because you cried so hard last night and you go on wearing the armor of a warrior because that's what you tell yourself: "I am a warrior." You lie to yourself because when the mask has been put off, you are back in pieces again, crying on your bed, wishing that tomorrow when you wake up the lie you keep telling will finally be the truth.

"I am a warrior. I am a warrior. I am a warrior."

As humans, being resilient is an admirable character while caving in is not an art you should display. Children are taught to rise up in an instant when they bruise their knees while men are taught that to cry means to be weak. But when reality bites the dust will you finally concede to the fact that you cannot overcome it under your own steam, you need a Helper to come in, remove your breastplate and win the war for you. You see, the moment you surrender your desire to be in control is the gateway for the Helper to come to your aid and display His power at work in you. Did you really think that He will let you alone to die in the battle? Did you really believe that He was blind to your tears and deaf to your groan? 

If you learn to truly open your eyes will you notice that you were too blind to see that while you are crying, He is there weeping with you and when you cannot find the words to pray, He is patiently listening to you. He was there all along, deep inside of you, telling you to surrender it to Him because you are not meant to carry such a big burden all by yourself. You were designed to run to Him for anything and in everything. It is only when you learn to let go that you will start to live. 

So even if the situation still doesn't change, you just go on and show up everyday, like how you are supposed to, but this time with the confidence that even if you don't wear the armor of a warrior, you can still win the war through your Mighty Helper. And when the victory is finally handed to you, then you will come to understand that the whole point of all this is to make you realize that His ways are far and beyond what your mind can comprehend.

The Medical City | Dec. 2021

xx,

Maica

The Only Constant

We get caught up with how time flies in this day and age. A few months back, we were just enjoying the summer and now, come all the Christmas jingles. It isn't far from obvious that life is too fast-paced nowadays that everything seems to be happening in a blink of an eye. Our food orders, online purchases, kids growing and, a whole lot more. 



We sometimes forget to take a pause and look around.



Look around and see how far you have come. From the waiting and whining, you have grown to a person who is so fiercely sure about where she is headed because she is guided. The way you carry yourself today speaks a lot about how you have managed to stand all the waves that went on. The testing of faith which is hurtful at the beginning, but slowly unveiled the purpose of why it had to happen. Seeing those things from the past make you appreciate what you have today. It makes you value the things you hold dearly right now. Then you start to realize, you never went through it all alone. Because He was there. And He is still with you.


See, a lot of things can take you away from remembering all the mighty things He has done for you. Sure we should not dwell on past victories but we should take time to revisit the learnings we have acquired from the storms we have went through. We have to remind ourselves that the same God who rescued us from whatever it was we were running from is the same God who is still walking beside us today. He does not change. He is constant.


What a relief it is to know that whatever I have done or whoever I may become, He remains the same. This brings comfort to my soul knowing that who He is today is who He will be in the future. He will always rescue me whenever I needed saving and He will always guide me when my light seems to be dim. And what does He require me to do in return? Nothing but to trust Him.


Trust that He is all-knowing and He always carry the better idea no matter how many times I insist that mine is good. Trust that even when it hurts I need to surrender things to Him. Trust that it might break my heart a little bit but He will always piece it back together and make it beautiful again. Trust that when things are surrendered to Him, He will show me far greater things than what I was keeping from Him.




Then my heart can rest knowing this.

                                             Taken from Pinterest



xx,
Maica

Nobody Said It Was Easy

Have you ever been in a season where you feel like your faith is neither cold nor hot but lukewarm? These are the moments that make you feel like everything is so familiar. The Sunday preaching, worship services, and bible study sessions become a routine that you include in your schedule every week. You get used to doing these things that you lost track of why you are doing it in the very first place. There are moments when you stick to your head, "Ah! I know where this preaching is gonna lead. I've heard this Scripture being taught over and over again." 


We've shut the ears of our hearts from receiving to God.


There are millions of temptations the world has to offer. Enough for us to turn our backs and divert our attention away from God. The world deceives us that there are far more important things than God. But, the world is lying. Most of the time temptation comes in front of our doorstep in a  wonderfully wrapped gift box. It is supposed to look enticing and welcoming like a fried crispy pork belly and its smell. But, its harmful to us. Sometimes temptation does not look as bad as we think it is. The enemy will use our family, friends, husband, wife, boss, church mate, ministry or anyone who is closed to us to tempt us and take us away from God. When something or someone demands your time with God, it is the enemy working behind it. As humans, we tend to fall short and that's why I'm grateful that God's grace is always available every time we need it. We cannot deny that sometimes we let our loved ones or things that are important to us take away our time with God. That's why we have to keep a keen eye to anyone or anything that distracts us in our quiet moments with God. 

Of course, the enemy would hate to see us at peace. The enemy rages in anger every time it sees us in our most peaceful moment. That's why it tries to shake our cage of peace. Our job is not to let it win. But how? 


1. By fighting for our time with God
When we decide in our mind and heart that God goes on the top of our endless list of priorities, it becomes easy for us to set a time to dwell in God's presence. We do not give God the leftovers of our time and energy but we give Him the best of ourselves. It doesn't become something we feel we are obliged to do, rather we long for it and we enjoy doing it.


2. By drinking in the spring of life
Every time we read the Bible, we are being renewed in spirit, heart, and mind. The Bible is a daily reminder of the kind of God that we worship and why we should continue doing so. It takes the spotlight away from ourselves and reminds us that this life is not meant for us to enjoy by doing the things that are desirable to us. Hence, it points out that we should die to ourselves and follow Jesus - the way, the truth, and the life.


3. By standing in faith with other believers
It is very important for us to stay in the circle of believers. As stated in the Scripture, "Bad company corrupts good moral." And so, if we are surrounded by believers then we could trust that there will be people who will lovingly point out sin in our lives and will generously provide a good and sound counsel on how to overcome bad habits.




Just like what our local pastor has said, "Every time we fail in reading God's Word, we should analyze what are we feeding ourselves instead?". If Jesus is the Bread of Life, why do we starve our spirit and soul? Why do we choose to feed ourselves by junk food and garbage offered by the world? The battlefield is in the mind. Once we set our mind about the truth about God's Word and why it is very important that we read and meditate on it, it becomes natural to us.



It is not easy, but it is worth the try.





Xx,
Maica

Will you?

When one door closes, another opens. Life has a funny way of surprising you by the changes it requires and if you're lucky enough, you get to prepare yourself first. But, what if God calls you to do something right away? Right at this moment. Right at this time.

Will you obey?


"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6


Sometimes God will ask you to surrender the things you desire the most not because He wants to hurt you but because He has greater plans in mind for you. The danger is when our hearts are not in the right position we ought to find it hard to discern why He needs to take such things in our lives. Pruning is part of the process if we want to grow in our relationship with God. He promised to cut off every branch that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. John 15:2 It might appear more reasonable if God asks you to surrender things that bring you no good but, what if he is asking for things that is delightful to us? 

Abraham, when told to go to the mountain to sacrifice his son Isaac as a burnt offering, strictly followed what God had instructed him to do. He built an altar on the mountain, arranged the wood on it and laid Isaac on the altar to slay him. Abraham never asked God, "Why?". His faith led him to that mountain with a knife on his hand ready to slay his son until the angel appeared and told him not to continue. There will come a time in our lives when God will ask us to do something we have no idea about. Abraham and Sarah waited and prayed for 25 years until God's promise come to pass and when Isaac was given to them, God asked them to sacrifice him. It can get confusing and painful when God takes away some things but we can always trust the Sovereignty of God in our situation. He makes the impossible possible and the unknown known. 


The challenge to us is to obey Him without asking why, to dive in when He asks us to jump, to trust Him even when it hurts and to fully surrender everything to Him. When we fully comprehend who God is, we can have the confidence to claim His promise even if the situation says otherwise.


The question is, "Will you surrender your Isaac to Him?"

- mt

Taking giant steps

When I received a call a year ago that my application to work abroad has been successful, I was ecstatic. This is what I was praying for and now, God has answered my prayer. As days passed by, and my departure date was fast approaching, my feelings changed from the giddy happy child to a worrisome fearful kid. I was happy, yes. I was grateful for my answered prayer but I didn't expect that the same prayer that I was asking God for will entail major life changes.


As I obey and follow God's directions, I cannot come to think that I've made it this far. Of course, all by God's grace. From the dependent spoiled daughter to an independent strong woman, God has showed me that His grace is sufficient in all season. He asked and still asks me to take big steps and like a child, I ask Him each time, "Will I make it?". It's quite funny how I always get the same answer from Him: "My grace will."


See, most of us are afraid of the unknown. We always want to be assured after taking the giant steps that God is asking us to conquer, that it will be greener on the other side. We demand God to give us a sign and a hint that where He is taking us is somewhere where the pot of gold hides. I hate to break this to you but, the pot of gold will not appear in just one giant step. God will require us to take small and giant steps until He sees that our hearts are well-molded and have gone stronger. He will not stop asking us to move forward, may it require half steps or extensive ones, because from there it will reveal how much we trust Him. It is always a struggle for us to trust God's plans because we have laid out beautiful plans for ourselves. I have nothing against people who are laying down plans for the next 10 years of their lives because I, myself, had also visualized what kind of future I would want. But as we laid out our plans before God, we should consider that God's plans will always prevail and we must be ready and willing to accept the changes He will present us with.


He will expect us to step out of our comfort zone. 

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”   Joshua 1:9 ESV


So, I encourage you to take heart and allow God to direct your steps. You can trust that where He is leading You is somewhere more beautiful than the plans you have for yourself. Expect changes and embrace it, nonetheless. Allow these changes to take your faith into a higher level and savor the moments when God will use You. Giant steps may seem hurtful but you will never know unless you cross what is in between. You will survive, young heart. Because of His grace.

Xx,
Maica

When God Makes You Wait

How many times did we get impatient with God's timing? We have turned our back to Him believing that He doesn't hear our prayers. Tolerating these grudges and anger that we plant in our hearts because He would not let us have these particular things at this specific time. But... just to realize that we become so ungrateful to many things.

Today, I had a conversation with my colleague about God. She was questioning why God needs to withold such things in our lives. Why does the answer have to be longer than we want it to be? I didn't notice I was asking the same question a few weeks back. I was desperately looking for answers to my questions that I was faced to answer it on my own. Then... I was moved.

God is not witholding anything from us. He is a generous God and He is willing to provide us with anything that we want. The question is not, "Why He witholds such things?". The question is, "Are we ready to receive the things He is witholding us with?". Are we ready to receive the blessings we are asking for? Many times, we think that we are fully able and prepared for the things that we are asking, only to find out that we are not.

Jeremiah 29:11 is clear about how God's thoughts are higher than ours. He knew us even before we get into this world. He knows every corner of our hearts. So, how he could not know if we are ready or not? You see, a child asking his father for a car is just like us, asking God for that big blessing. We are not yet ready for it or shall I say, our character is not yet ready for it. God needs to transform us to the person He wants us to be. The kind of person that can handle such big blessing. The characters that we need to possess before getting the blessing. What if the father mindlessly gives the child the car that he is asking? Will he be able to drive it on his own?

We ask God for these big blessings and yet we do not know whether we can handle it or not. God's timing is the best. He is never late nor early. He is always on time. His will is perfect and pleasing. All He is asking us to do is to trust Him. To trust that He is God and we are not. Come to think of how great it will be if we wait and see how God will unfold His plans and how He will transform us in the process. We need to focus on the Giver and not the prize. After all, everything comes from Him, because blessings without God is nothing. 

Xx,

Maica

Just See You Again

My heart is fervently pounding
While the clock is hastily ticking
Every moment seems to be fleeting
Whilst I caught myself blankly staring


Questions occupy my troubled mobbed mind
But answers seem to be arduous to find
Or maybe I am pretending to be some kind of a blind
Because the answers are utterly unkind


All the memories, I shall treasure forever
I truly pledge to say goodbye never
It will be hard, yes, the hardest ever
But my heart will love you may I be wherever


No goodbyes, just see you again
Well, we are all under only one heaven
I'll tell you a trick, just count one to seven
I'll see you soon... But who knows when?



-m.t.

Starting a new page and closing old ones

Change is inevitable. It is something that we cannot escape from no matter how hard we try to run. Change does not always happen in a big manner, sometimes it takes small changes to obviously see how much you differ from then to now. Most of the time, it is painful. Yes. But after a while, you learn how to embrace and live it up. Change is necessary.

Oftentimes, we do not notice that it is solely us who desire the change. We want to grow up fast but regret that we did not fully live our youthful days. We want to graduate from school so we could work and earn money but regret and wish if we can just stay at school forever. We want to have boyfriend even if we're still not on the right age but regret because we got lower grades when we started dating that boy. We want to get married before we turn 23 but regret because we still cannot sleep without knowing that our parents are just on the other room.

We simply do not really know what we want which proves that we are not the best caretakers of our lives. Someone greater must exist because if we will depend our lives in our own hands, it will turn out to be miserable. Our plans which we thought are the best there is, turn out to be the main thing that will destroy our lives. That's why we need someone who is higher than us, someone who is not like us. 

We need Jesus, our God. We need Him to redirect our paths whenever we missed a turn. We need Him to tell us which way to go. We need Him to remind us that we are not perfect and that it is okay because He is not requiring us to be. This is the main reason why we need Him -- because we are not perfect enough to be the controller of our own lives. 

Jesus is the only Truth, the Way and the Life. Without Him, our lives are nothing but a mess. I am not telling these things without a proof. My changed life is an evidence that we are nothing without Jesus. I am a wretch, lost girl until Jesus came and rescued me. His grace absolutely changes everything. He can turn a heart of stone into a heart of flesh. I have nothing to offer but He loved me. He just wants my heart to be fully surrendered to Him. For a God like Him to ask for my heart that is broken, torn apart and barely functioning leaves me dumbfound. He wishes for my heart even if it is in its ugliest form. A God like Him should be given the most beautiful things the world can offer but He is asking for my ugly, poor heart. That's when I decided that I'm gonna follow Him no matter what's the cost.

Today, I had a lot of changes that are painful but are necessary. Changes that I never thought will happen. But I hold on to the fact that God has a purpose why things need to be put out of my life, why people have to leave and why some things are really never gonna work out. I am stoked to see why things happen this way. I await for the revelation of God in this season because I know nothing but He is faithful and a promise keeper.

xx,
Maica

You

Your love for me goes beyond perfection
Did You ever think twice before giving me this affection?
I am used to putting myself into isolation
What is in me that You find as an attraction?


All of it changed when You walked into my life
My questions were answered especially my why's
You made everything beautiful, I would not lie
Thank You for believing that I am worth the fight


Life for me has been so much better
I cannot imagine living without us together
I know we can fathom any kind of weather
I believed You when You said forever


Please hold me as tight as You can
I will never make it without Your helping hand
When all things are said and done
I know You're the only One who will never be gone




- mt

We are all called for a purpose

Humans are not just meant to exist but to live. By living, it means that we are meant to affect other people and make an impact in this world. Now, I believe that some people's impact is not as big as other people's impact. Let's say, the impact of a pebble thrown away carelessly into the pond only results to one drop. On the other hand, strategically throwing the pebble into the water can cause a ripple effect which is totally different from a one drop. But no matter how big or small our impact may be, the important thing is we tried to give our life a good fight.

We are all called for a purpose. We are not here by accident. I do not believe that some matter in the universe exploded and resulted to the existence of human life. We are made more than that. We are fearfully and wonderfully made. We have a destiny and our mission is to know our purpose.

I'm sure, you have this question in mind: "How will I know my purpose?"
I've thought of this question also, don't worry. For more than 2 years that I've been walking with God, I realized that our purpose cannot be revealed to us easily. For some, maybe they were revealed right away, but for most, we have to seek it. How do we seek it? By going to the One who has created us, to the One who holds our destiny and to the One who has written and planned our life -- Lord, Jesus Christ. We seek Him first before anything else. We make an effort to get to know Him by reading His Word (The Bible). I've never received as much Good News as what The Bible contains. If we are just patient and eager to know God's Word, we can be saved from a lot of heartaches. 

I am grateful that as I continue to seek God and as He continues to reveal Himself to me, I slowly discover the purpose of my life. Sometimes God will ask us to walk outside the boat and to trust that He will enable us to walk into the water. Do not be afraid! He will not ask us to walk in the water without Him going into it first. He has tested the deepness of the water before He lets us walk into it. He will not let us drown. He never fails.

Job 23:10-12 (NIV)

10 But he knows the way that I take;

when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold.

11 My feet have closely followed his steps;

I have kept to his way without turning aside.

12 I have not departed from the commands of his lips;

I have treasured the words of his mouth more than my daily bread.

xx,

Maica

Wanderlust

All of us have this little traveler in the deepest corner of our hearts. The urge to travel, to see the world in different views, to relate with other people, to come across the colorful cultures, to be in awe by a beauty that is natural, to escape from the familiar and to fully understand who we really are. To abandon our homes for the sake of seeking for something new and better but eventually realizing that there is no place like home.

We go gaga over the holiday's seat sales to book the cheapest possible flight. We save up for our dream trips. We willingly give up a greater part of our savings to explore the world. We are thirsty to be somewhere we've never been before. Nevertheless, it is absolutely worth every cent. We get to see that the world is broad and there's so much to see. We bump into people, assimilate the way they live and in due course adapt them.

I haven't been everywhere but it's definitely on my list. I want to see the beauty of this big, wide and wild world. I want to be touched by how certain people live differently and yet have this connection that is incomprehensible. I want to write about my experiences with the different places I've been to and be able to narrate the feelings that I have to let others see or even feel, what I saw and felt. I want to be in touch on what's happening with this world and relate with the people I barely know. I want to be influenced by their vibrant cultures and yet remain faithful to what I am really believing for. I want to get out of my comfort zone.

One day, I know, this is certain, I'm gonna go and travel the world. One place at a time or maybe two. But I am, without a doubt, going to press on with my dreams and see them come into reality. 

"My restless, roaming spirit, would not allow me to remain at home very long."

" The world is a book and those who do not travel read only a page."

xx,

Maica